Ok so where do I begin. A diary is something that you do when you are 10, talking about the boy in your class you fancy from a far....not something you do at 41 to try and express who you were, are, are intend to be. Or rather who you think you are, were and intend to be???
Ok so it began..At an early age I realised I had, what others would call ambition. I was never very good at school, I went to many of them as my parents moved around and I realised from a young age that I only learned what I was interested in. All this stuff that people tried to tell me was important I didnt see the point. When I did enjoy something god did I work at it. I got inner anger when someone was better than me.
I went through the typical 80s childhood, divorced mother in her late 20s decided that two kids who she had pre 20 was lets say not exactly a good receipy for attracting a potential partner who would keep her in the life she believed she should be kept in. So my grandmother came to be the "mummy" and she was the mother. The cool, glam mother who drifted in and out however still sustained the cudos of the "hard working single mother" to all that would listen. My mother was glam, extravert and had them queing at the door. She enjoyed a good single life and my nanna gave up her work at 58 and became my protector. I always knew the roles they played and I loved the fact I had a cool mother. Ok so she never was at plays, sports days etc but hey when you are a hard working single mum you dont have time do you?? As I got to 8 my mother caught, what she believed was the cream of the ocean. He gave her what she wanted, a position. He was educated, something she had always wanted and continued to tell everyone she had. She had a chip about education or rather her lack of. Over the years up to the age of 14 we moved around quite alot and I attended numerous schools, most for no longer than 12 months. It was ok, I learnt to make friends quickly and become a bit of a diplomat. I never really made "best friends" but I was one of those kids who had loads of friends and never sectioned my self to one "gang" thus I never got bullied which was quite unusual considering my accent never fitted in to each area and eventually I lost any trace of my place of origin.
By the time I left school at 16 in another country to my birth I realised that I was ambitious as some would say. I realised also that I was not exactly educated and unfortunately had dyslexia. Ok, so there was a few hurdles but hey ho what the hell. At 16 I told my mother I was going to get a job, I worked for 6 months then went back packing around the far east. My mother gave me a few hundred dollars and waved me off. Thinking about it what the hell was I doing??? 16 and trecking around numerous countries alone...more to the point what the hell was she doing letting me go...as I said before thought she was a Thatcher mother. I will digress for a minute and explain what I mean by a Thatcher Mother
